Looking for how to thrive during the time of COVID-19? What’s your sign? TCE’s cosmic coping strategies are here to help you deal with life right now:


Your apartment was already spotless before you stayed inside for months. But with only your stuff to look at for the past few months, you have been busy. You alphabetized your books, then re-organized them by colour, then realized that’s a horrible way to organize and put them back into alphabetical order and finally sub-divided by genre. You already had stockpiles of disinfectant wipes and were ready to share with friends in need. Now? You’re stressed about going outside and are researching how to buy one of those bubble-soccer outfits.


You’re stuck figuring out how to support all the local businesses you love. You logically know you shouldn’t order lunch from three different places in one day, but your heart wants you to. What you can do is pick-up your iced coffee from one and a sandwich from another. Throw in at least one impulsive purchase from a local artisan and you can’t go wrong. Probably. Maybe.


No one entirely knows what you’ve been up to during the past four months, and you like it that way. You’re crafty and resourceful and it’s okay that you’ve dived passionately into at least four different hobbies in this time, with varying success. You’ve struggled watching your efforts go unnoticed by others, but they have been seen. Now’s the time to complete that artist application that’s been weighing on you. You can do big things!


You’re used to hopping from one adventure to the next, and with your travel options now limited, you’re feeling stuck. Go be a tourist in your own town. Throw on your headphones and hit Forwell Trail listening to local artists with Create Waterloo’s cool new Trail Mix playlist. Take selfies in front of colourful local murals, or sign up for a virtual yoga class. Your world just got a little bigger.


You led your workplace to an easy transition of working from home, launched a new project and have probably encouraged your friends to do the same. You’ve been trying to balance your desire to be left alone with the need to be included in friends’ plans. You might not always join in on the Happy Hour after work, but you helped coordinate it and you want to be invited, dammit.


If you’re feeling like you’re caught up in the things going on in the world, and on your social media feeds, it might be time to take a little break. Some time alone and space to clear your head will serve you well. Remember that you always feel the most grounded by water. Take a solo trip to the Grand River for the day. You’ll feel better in no time.


We know you’ve been holed up in your house, trying to distract yourself from the sense of impending doom. But we also know you’ve curated a few great playlists specifically catered to these moods. So slip into one of your daydreams, and put one on, or pick up your book club’s latest library pick. Live out the fantasy. Maybe start letter writing like you always wanted to. How romantic.


You’ve survived more than a few impulsive hair styling choices in this time. I’m sure you’re excited to see your stylist again, and your stylist, well, they’re concerned to see the outcome of you cutting your own bangs at 3 a.m. one night while Instagramming Live. Don’t have your own stylist? Maybe check out some of the nominations of Best Of and find one.

APRIL 20 — MAY 20

You’ve been ready for the apocalypse since the day you were born. This is your moment to shine. You’ve been one step ahead of everyone you know all summer. You’re still stockpiling enough root vegetables from the Kitchener Market to see you through, and maybe even a little extra for your disorganized loved ones. Get ready to harvest that garden of yours and start canning. You’ve got this.

MAY 21 — JUNE 20

You’ve had a lot on your mind and might be finding it hard not to get distracted. You’ve been telling your boss you’re putting in a full day of work from home, when in reality, you’ve snuck out to get bao over an extended lunch this month a few more times than you care to admit. Set realistic goals for yourself and try not to over-think things too much.

JUNE 21 — JULY 22

You can’t be in everyone’s social bubble. You know that — but you also can’t help but wonder if everyone is having fun without you. You’re sick of all the virtual Houseparty hangouts, but it would still be nice to be invited. To make matters worse, you’re starting to think your cat might be sick of you. Try not to take everything so personally.


Oh Leo’s, you’ve been hit the hardest in this time of isolation. You’re typically the life of the party and your vibe has been suffering. You’ve pivoted though. Your friends appreciate the dedication to Zoom parties, or physically distanced hangouts from the driveway. You’re still the belle of the ball from six feet away — the party just looks a bit different.


TCE Horoscopes (and this month’s cover) are illustrated by Cara Vandermey. This issue Vandermey is celebrating essential workers.
TCE thanks Waterloo Region’s essential workers for all you do to continue to provide for us. Much Love.